This is 4am.

This is why I even got a cat. Other than for the lifetime lasting friendship that I culivate with my feline friend. He prowls the kitchen and grabs a snack of kibble before crouching low at the living room entrance. He stalks his mouse that's a few feet away in my fingertips, I wiggle the toy taunting him. He wiggles his rear in return and his young muscles tense up getting ready for the kill. I wait, it's a game of patience with him and the mouse. He makes the first move and starts to run toward the toy which I, at the last minute fling skyward as he springs up to snag the mouse, put it in his mouth for the kill and land softly with four feet on the ground. Truly acrobatic. As well as entertaining. Which is partly why I adopted him in the first place.

The other reasons are many, I don's plan to have any kids in the near, distant or any future, but I do always plan to have furry, four legged children. They don't require any more emotions other than happy. Which they often times provide in the first place. Take my cat for instance. I wake up at 4am and, of course can't go back to sleep until after I've laid awake for two hours tossing and turning trying to appease my ever complaining back. All the while my brain and over active imagination turn every simple encounter of the day into hellish future pain. They bring to life every awful circumstance going as bad as each one could from my soul mate and I brutally breaking up to one of us dying. Usually it's him since I'm scared to death to live this life without him. He's my reason for being on this earth. Him and my cat. Which brings me to my point. My cat keeps all that brain noise at bay. I still have to get up to help my back stretch out and ease up but at least my kitty wakes up with me and even though I started out my unwanted morning ritual with dark thoughts, he brings me his bright yellow, toy mouse so that he can play. Ultimately he's asking me, his mommy cat substitute, to help him burn off excess energy which we both seem to have but his is burnt off by jumping at the toy. Mine is burnt off tossing the toy for him and getting up to grab it when he losses it. In the end we're both happy. After about an hour we're both tired again but I'm not full of self loathing that my darling boyfriend helps me undo every time. I'm peaceful and content that I helped my kitty have an excellent exercise session and I got to have fun. I'm happy because my cat made me happy.